It's Panto Time!

Reporting to you tonight on our experience of an English Christmas tradition: the pantomime, or "panto" for short. Back in about October an English friend who is back in Britain after living overseas for many years said she was "desperate" to get tickets for the panto, so I figured it must be pretty good and our first English Christmas wouldn't be complete without it.

So, what is a panto? Not to be confused with the other shortened version of pantomime, it's not a mime show. Nothing at all to do with Marcel Marceau. (We met an American woman who said their first Christmas here they thought they were taking the family to the silent-type mime show, had told their kids all about what to expect, and they were all totally confused.) Usually a traditional story like Snow White or Jack and the Beanstalk, it's an event for the whole family. We saw Cinderella at the Windsor Theatre Royal, across the street from Windsor Castle.

The cast included Jess Conrad, a 1960's teen idol as Cinderella's father; a couple of pop band stars as Cinderella and Prince Charming; a BBC TV gardening show hostess as the fairy godmother (she should stick with gardening); a "Britain's Got Talent" semi-finalist and a couple of men in drag as the ugly stepsisters. Critical ingredient of panto: men in drag. Another must-have: audience participation. We've been told every panto has a bad guy or something behind a character who is oblivious to the presence, and the audience therefore shouts repeatedly some variation of, "He's behind you!" And yes, they worked that into Cinderella.

One character hides some money in a mince pie (mince pies are very big here). He asks the "boys and girls" of the audience to let him know if anyone tries to eat the pie by shouting his name really loudly so every time someone tries to take the pie you have several hundred people, young and old, yelling, "Buttons!"

For the preschool set, we've got a special appearance by Fireman Sam. For the grown-ups, lots of jokes about Prince Charming's balls and other innuendo. The Fairy Godmother can't act, but the stage crew pull off some great magic when 2 real miniature horses appear to pull Cinderella's carriage.

And did I mention it's a musical? Cinderella's big opening number was an adaptation of Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'". Her father, excited at the prospect of marrying off his ugly stepdaughters, croaks out the Black Eyed Peas' "I Gotta Feeling." They're just getting started. Later we're treated to a bit of "Dancing Queen" and then everybody's on their feet for the Village People's "YMCA." And we have dancers on stage in Village People costume. Indian headdress. Cop. Cowboy. Everyone is doing the arm motions and singing along. You're wondering what this has to do with Cinderella? Doesn't matter! Everyone's having a good time.

In the end the glass slipper fits and we're treated to a royal wedding. The whole thing was great fun and I look forward to another panto next year.

Merry Christmas!